A foundation for any great dynamic

Before engaging in any relationship (yes even one-night stand) you should do some basic vetting to check the partner you are engaging with is safe for your mentally and physically.

For a dynamic or ownership this should be extended, and you should spend around a month playing to ensure you are a good fit. When starting the vetting, make it clear that you would like to engage in a dynamic with the person, and what date the vetting will be reviewed.

“Hey, I would like to vet you to be my new sub 🙂 If you are interested, then I suggest we start the vetting today the 1st of January and we will do a review on the 30th of January. At this point we will end the vetting and either continue in a dynamic, end it or extend the vetting for a further week.”

During the vetting, its good to check a few things, either through AMA or similar. Try and keep the space an equal share space.

What kink both enjoy and if they match, and what kinks must be included and which you can be flexible around

What expectations you have for the dynamic. It can be good to share the ownership rules, so you can both review to see if there is any expectations that cannot be met.

Some conversations should be had around how you wish to engage with other play partners(s) and if its allowed at all

Having some fun is important too! so take a few of the kinks from the kink list to play with. This will also help both parties to understand how to engage together.

Once you are at the end of the vetting, set up a space where you are all equal and can discuss and ask for feedback. Consider not asking “did you have anything you didnt like” ask “what did you like the least” as this will engage the other party in looking for examples.

Look out for: “Can this person communicate what they enjoy to me” “Can this person communicate what they do not like” “Does this person understand the safety measures needed in BDSM” “Has this person checked and provided aftercare for me after play” (this applies to both submissives and dominants. Dominants should also receive aftercare!)

Vetting Rules:

Playing with other Mistresses in FEMDOM is allowed, as long as you tell Mistress if something upsets you or if you come across a new kink you enjoy.

Keeping you safe and happy is important

while we vet I expect communication on anything that’s bringing concerns on ownership.

You are welcome to vet other Doms during this period, but if we finish vetting and agree on ownership, this ends.

This is both rl and online DOMS For your personal life I won’t interfer, but do not go see another Dom nor go to a BDSM club without first having my explicit permission

I allow bratting, however I do not allow disrespect.

If I think you are bordering disrespect, I will make this very clear

It is absolutely okay to say No, so make sure you do where needed

Patience is a must

Honesty is a must

Communication is a must

If you are having a bad day, I want you to tell me. Despite what ever caused it, its important to know so I can ensure you are looked after.

You do not need to tell me what caused it, if you feel vunerable about this, but I still want to know

If you feel overheard or not listened to, add ATTENTION into it. It will highlight for me, you need space to get your point across